You Knew Exactly What To Do

This heart breaks more, because
when my hands dripped sweat before every important class,
your fingers intertwined with mine, and everything was fine.
Because you knew exactly what to do.

This heart breaks more, because
we only had eyes for each other in a campus with 60 people,
and every time my eyes wandered, you brought them back home.
Because you knew exactly what to do.

This heart breaks more, because
your coarse hands reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear,
and the hands stayed there until you looked at me as if to say, “I’m always here.”
Because you knew exactly what to do.

This heart breaks more, because
every time I was mad at you,
you would challenge me to not laugh at the count of three,
and I always lost at that game.
Because you knew exactly what to do.

This heart breaks more, because
I trusted you that night under the blanket of stars
when I told you that I am scared to lose you,
and all you had promised was that you’ll never leave.
Because you knew exactly what to do.

This heart breaks more, because
all my walls broke down and gave way to you,
all my guards stopped ringing alarm bells.
Because you knew exactly what to do.

This heart breaks more, because
you were the same person to tell me that you didn’t love me anymore,
the same person to perform these little acts with someone else.

And it turns out that
you knew exactly what to do,
to break my heart too.

Anisha Reddy is a trainee journalist at the Indian Institute of Journalism and New Media, Bangalore.

Featured image: Michael Fenton / Unsplash