Apathy in the Time of Corona

I turn softly to the side as
My ears pick up something
Heavy lids lift up
Eyes wide open
A yawn and a stretch later
I get off my bed
One limb at a time
Leave my heart at its corner
It has no purpose to serve in these times
Except for when it breaks.

Dragging my feet
Scratching my head
Eyes moving on their own
Looking for the source of the sound
Sleep tends to evade me these days anyway.

It’s not the sound
That caught my interest
It is the emotion within
I don’t remember what joy sounds like anymore
But this might come close.

I walk to the window
Finding the source
There are birds outside
They don’t chirp
These days
They sing
Symphonies of nature
That puts all the music in the world to shame.

They sing for hours
I’ve never heard them like this before
Not even in a Disney montage
They sound like hope and joy and love
And other tricks of life
That stopped belonging
To our kind
A while ago.

I fear they are cursing us
Our monstrous existence
All of our lives
All the damage and
All of the denial we bring with us.

I wonder if the birds know
How much we enjoy
Destroying ourselves
And this world that we live in
One day at a time
A slur, a plastic bag, a crime.

I wonder if they know
We’re all dying
Maybe faster than they are
Maybe in more pain too.

I catch the eye of a bird
It stops with its song
Tilts its head
A hundred angles in a moment
And lets out a string of curses.

I chuckle at the thought
As others join in.

I wonder if they know
I deserve it
I’m as bad as everyone else.

I wonder how it would
Make me feel
If I hadn’t left
My heart
At the corner of the bed.

Adritanaya Tiwari is a Dental student in her final year of college, she writes because it makes her mind a little less crowded and her heart much warmer.

Featured image credit: Barnard Tonmoy