Recipe: The Makings of a Sexist Bollywood Song

‘Tu cheez badi hai mast mast
Tu cheez badi hai mast.’
Udit Narayan, Kavita Krishnamurthy, 1994

‘Bitches ain’t shit but hoes and tricks
Lick on these nuts and suck the d*ck.’
Snoop Dogg, 1992

‘Hai tujhpe right mera, tu hai delight mera’
Mika Singh, 2013

‘How come you taste so good
Just like a black girl should.’
Rolling Stones, 1971

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Ingredients:

• Half a bowl of adequate synonyms for the word ‘whore’
• Three tablespoons of blinding lust
• Half a kg of her body parts that will best cater to the male gaze
• Five teaspoons of degrading/dehumanising sexual imagery, the raw kind
• Half a cup mention of cars, drugs, alcohol and money to enhance the true gold digger flavour
• A full bowl of crushed consent
• A ‘gori’ for garnish

Method:

• Wash your hands before we start, this is about to get dirty.
• To prepare the dough, lay down a woman as an accessory and knead with hard hitting cuss words until her bodily integrity is completely destroyed.
• Add the objectifying elements, while stirring your sexual drive slowly. Make sure the mixture is deprived of any consent. It would ruin the mood.
• In another bowl, pour a glass of harassing undertones displayed as love making and gradually turn the heat up as you legitimise eve-teasing, sadism and stalking as love.
• Mix thoroughly until the mixture and her self respect are reduced to a pulp.
• In a heated pan, add arguments like “it’s just a song” and stir vigorously while mouthing the above listed lyrics. (“Bitches ain’t shit but hoes and…”)
• Keep stirring until you start to sing, accept, internalise, perform and justify the “just a song”. Preferably idolise the icons that served it to you.
• As per taste, add salt and dismiss this entire conversation as a salty feminist rant.
• Garnish with a music video where you cannot tell the difference between a body from a bouncing ragdoll.
• Best served cold.

Sounds like misogyny music to my ears.

Mansi Vijay is a final-year undergraduate student of English Literature from Miranda House, Delhi University. She is also a spoken word artist and writer.

Featured image credit: Richard Reid/Pixabay