She is Shabnam

She is young
She just turned thirty six
But she doesn’t know what to do with the clock,
It is relentless
Every minute she hears it tick.
She is a successful entrepreneur,
Busy, aspiring, ambitious, self-assured,
If you meet her, you will be impressed for sure.
She is looking for a companion, a partner,
But somehow, by the day, it’s getting harder.
She is a regular girl,
Seeking stability and warmth and love.
She has been to a few dating apps
Suffers no handicap
She is pretty, sexy, witty
She is also every bit loving, giving, respectful,
Ready to warm up to a new set of people.
In fact, she is a very wholesome kind of a person,
She loves to cook and clean
Fits even that gendered stereotype by every mean
But you will be surprised,
She has no suitors.
Her mother thinks the problem stems from her success
She feels that it is one thing men find it hard to stomach…
She owns a plush home,
Drives a fancy car,
Runs a huge corporation,
Has a mind of her own,
Could that be the reason she is still alone?
She is told that men like demure wives who are dependent,
who receive every penny, every privilege doled out by their husbands
With gratitude and contentment.
Some even say that men find meek and submissive women to be more sexually attractive,
The kinds who can be kept happy and engaged with a few gifts and diamonds…
Now, here lies the rub
Our lady can afford it all by herself and more
She is not looking for a provider,

All that she seeks is a cosy companionship,
Strangely, her independence stands in her
Probably one of the many games patriarchy can play!

This Sunday, she again inserted an advertisement in a matrimonial column,
She seeks an alliance with a man who is under no pressure to assert his masculinity through material means,
One who appreciates her urge to realise her dreams,
One who delights in her success, as much as she revels in his,
A simple camaraderie,
a promise to hold each other’s hand through thick and thin.
Well, if you’re one who understands that there is no contradiction
between marital devotion and professional fulfillment in a woman’s life,
She is a great match.
I already told you she is warm and affectionate and kind
Only one condition – she won’t allow anyone to enslave her mind.
See, her biological clock is ticking away,
She wants to marry
Be a mum
If she appeals to you,
Do write back to her,
She is Shabnam.

Sangeeta Kampani, 64, is formerly from the IRS and retired as Commissioner of Income Tax, Delhi.

Featured image: Ramin Talebi / Unsplash