Solace in You

the last thing i’d want to do is hurt you.
i know you’ve seen some of my shades,
a palette so despicable i fail to visualise it.
it’s understandable that you’d want a world
more monochrome, but the last thing i’d want
to do, is hurt you.

maybe i overestimate our proximity,
to hope for hands holding over paths beside lakes
or an embrace so great even snow stops to admire.
hugs of surprise from behind,
kisses on the forehead,
tearful eyes to capture my heart.
guess, fairytales are better inscribed with glitter.

i chase you so frantically,
frightened to lose you any second.
perhaps that’s why you ran away. to escape.
nightingales chant my nightmares
to help haunt me horrifically.
hourly talks now mere dry ink on spoilt paper.
even the rose dried, and the smell rots.

the seconds you breathed,
i sought life and fought for peace.
the world’s always a blur, with you it pacified.
you brushed the agony in my eyes
for a mystical softness.
and years passed yet the onlookers
remembered the tales of our cuddles in buses.

still frightened, i tremble before every thought
of seeing you escape into the wilderness.
a place so free of me.
where you might find peace with your own soul,
away from me. yet every time i chase you,
chase you to reconcile, you feel afraid.
and seek out your homage in the wilderness.

leaving me on subway stations,
to aimlessly glare at a feeling of distraught.
legs still trembling, head down, hood on.
tears find place without your solace.
hands interlocked with each other,
lips purring and stuttering,
hoping for an arm on the shoulder
and an embrace to make the snow admire.

Devarya Singhania is a published poet, and has an Amazon Kindle Bestseller titled Armories and Arsenals. He deterministically intends to pursue watching The Big Bang Theory as a career choice. You can find him on Instagram through the username @iamdevarya.

Featured image: Siim Lukka / Unsplash